Solitude gets a bad rap. 

I was recording an episode yesterday with a friend who happens to be a well-known yoga instructor. She said something during our session that stuck with me. “You, out of almost anyone I know, are the best at being alone.”

She expanded a little more on the subject. As she did, I felt tears well up behind my eyeballs. Tears that I fought back as I took a deep breath and continued on with our discussion. Once she was done with her thought, I thanked her for the well-intended compliment. Then I told her my truth.

Getting “good” at spending time alone wasn’t something that happened for me overnight, and to this day, the fact that I’m “good” at it triggers a lot of emotions. On one hand, I’m grateful I know how to enjoy time by myself. I think that it’s important that whether a person is single or attached, they feel comfortable sitting with themselves in stillness, solo. Doing things solo. Shopping, solo. Eating out, solo. Hanging out in the park, solo. Traveling, solo. (You get the idea.) I’m of the mindset that it’s important that we make the time to listen to what’s really happening within us, and in that discomfort (because let’s be real, that happens) we learn about ourselves.

On the other hand, despite me being thankful that I’m cool hanging out with me, myself, and I, it’s a little … meh. That’s because it’s not always by choice. I’m a single almost-33-year-old who has had a handful of dear friends leave New York over the past 14 months. I’m at a point where I’m ready to share both the good times and the bad times with someone else, but I’m 100 percent not rushing into the wrong thing — romantically speaking. And while I’m so appreciative of my friendships, it’s tough that many of them are long distance. So, while I’m focused on quality over quantity, that has made for more alone time.

I digress. Yesterday, I offered my friend a piece of advice that I want to share with you today: To get good at spending time alone, sometimes you need to “date” yourself. Make plans. These don’t have to be expensive arrangements, like dinners at your favorite restaurant (although, I do love a good one-on-one date with a bowl of pasta and a glass of red) or trips to faraway places. Make a date with yourself to go on a run. Read a book on a sunny day. Ride a bike for a while without a destination in mind. It may feel a little awkward at first, but with time, you’ll look forward to it. Trust me. Emotions happen, but I’m so proud of myself for getting to this point.

My true unlock was realizing that there are so many things in life that bring me joy. Joy for just me. On my own.

That felt really, really special.

PROMPT: How can you take some alone time for yourself this week?